{"id":2383,"date":"2020-03-12T02:02:06","date_gmt":"2020-03-11T22:02:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/fedai.az\/?p=2383"},"modified":"2020-03-12T02:06:00","modified_gmt":"2020-03-11T22:06:00","slug":"bir-mu%c9%99llimin-monoloqu-olu-sairl%c9%99r-c%c9%99miyy%c9%99tind%c9%99n-reportaj","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/?p=2383","title":{"rendered":"Bir m\u00fc\u0259llimin monoloqu &#8212; \u00d6l\u00fc \u015eairl\u0259r c\u0259miyy\u0259tind\u0259n reportaj&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><strong>Bu m\u0259nim s\u0259h\u0259ri dirig\u00f6zl\u00fc a\u00e7d\u0131\u011f\u0131m adi g\u00fcnl\u0259rimd\u0259n deyildi: B\u00fct\u00fcn gec\u0259ni \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 t\u00fcp\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcl\u0259r&#8230;<br><\/strong><br>K\u00fcnc\u0259 s\u0131x\u0131\u015fd\u0131r\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259ki tavan g\u00f6y \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fcn Allah qat\u0131 il\u0259 birg\u0259 \u00fcst\u00fcm\u0259 u\u00e7urulmu\u015fdu. N\u0259 ed\u0259c\u0259yimi bilmirdim. \u00c7ox-\u00e7ox uzaqlarda G\u00fcn\u0259\u015fin ayaq s\u0259sl\u0259ri e\u015fidil\u0259nd\u0259, qaranl\u0131q d\u00fcnyam\u0131n xarabal\u0131qlar\u0131 alt\u0131nda qalm\u0131\u015f Tanr\u0131 il\u0259 ilk d\u0259f\u0259 \u00fcz-\u00fcz\u0259 g\u0259ldim. Onun \u00fcmidsiz bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131nda \u00e7oxsayl\u0131 suallar\u0131m\u0131n ancaq birc\u0259 cavab\u0131 &#8212; boz-bulan\u0131q r\u0259smim vard\u0131:<strong>&nbsp;&#171;O\u011flum, s\u0259n indi bu k\u00f6kd\u0259 m\u0259kt\u0259b\u0259 nec\u0259 ged\u0259c\u0259ks\u0259n, \u015fagirdl\u0259rinin qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131na nec\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xacaqsan!?&#187;<br><\/strong><br>Daha m\u0259n\u0259 h\u0259r \u015fey, h\u0259tta Tanr\u0131n\u0131n m\u0259rh\u0259m\u0259ti bel\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n \u00fcz d\u00f6nd\u0259rmi\u015f bir ovuc adamla eyni m\u0259kanda ya\u015fama\u011f\u0131n \u0259zab\u0131 \u00f6n\u00fcnd\u0259 yersiz g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc. Se\u00e7\u0259nl\u0259 se\u00e7il\u0259nin aras\u0131nda qalm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Se\u00e7\u0259nin d\u0259, se\u00e7il\u0259nin d\u0259 qapaz\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131ma d\u0259yirdi, t\u00fcp\u00fcrc\u0259yi sif\u0259tim\u0259 \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131. Q\u0259z\u0259b ham\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n alm\u0131\u015fd\u0131, ham\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 udmu\u015fdu. Bu z\u00fclm\u0259t qaranl\u0131qda kimins\u0259 iyn\u0259nin s\u0259d\u0259fi boyda bir i\u015f\u0131q ucu tapaca\u011f\u0131na \u2013 he\u00e7 olmasa \u201cAna\u201d, \u201cV\u0259t\u0259n\u201d s\u00f6zl\u0259rini yazma\u011f\u0131 \u00f6yr\u0259tdiyim\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 m\u0259ni ba\u011f\u0131\u015flayaca\u011f\u0131na g\u00fcman\u0131m yox idi&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ancaq Tanr\u0131 s\u0259n\u0259tini el\u0259 Tanr\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fc qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndaca al\u00e7aldanlardan m\u0259rh\u0259m\u0259t dil\u0259m\u0259k fikrind\u0259 deyildim. Oturdu\u011fu buda\u011f\u0131 v\u0259h\u015fi ehtirasla baltalayan adamlara indi n\u0259yis\u0259 ba\u015fa salmaq onsuz da gec idi. H\u0259tta G\u00fcn\u0259\u015f bel\u0259 milyon ill\u0259rdir s\u0259brl\u0259-t\u0259mkinl\u0259 add\u0131mlad\u0131\u011f\u0131 yolundan azm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. H\u0259min g\u00fcn m\u0259nim V\u0259t\u0259nim\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259di&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>H\u0259min g\u00fcn m\u0259nim s\u0259h\u0259rim a\u00e7\u0131lmad\u0131&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Adamlar\u0131n ehtirasl\u0131 bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131 bir-birin\u0259 \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131ld\u0131qca, el\u0259 bil ild\u0131r\u0131m \u00e7ax\u0131rd\u0131. Ani s\u0131\u00e7ray\u0131\u015flarda onlar\u0131n t\u00fck\u0259nm\u0259y\u0259n s\u0131ras\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. N\u0259f\u0259sim t\u0259ntidi, g\u00f6zl\u0259rim qarald\u0131. Bu d\u0259f\u0259 i\u00e7im\u0259 qaranl\u0131q \u00e7\u00f6kd\u00fc&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Bura m\u0259nim \u0259n a\u011f\u0131r g\u00fcnl\u0259rimd\u0259 ham\u0131dan, h\u0259tta \u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259n bel\u0259 qa\u00e7\u0131b gizl\u0259ndiyim, ham\u0131dan, h\u0259tta \u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259n bel\u0259 qorudu\u011fum yegan\u0259 s\u0131\u011f\u0131naca\u011f\u0131m idi. Orada \u0259n m\u00fcq\u0259dd\u0259s Tanr\u0131 \u0259man\u0259tl\u0259rinin el\u00e7isi, x\u0259yan\u0259tin, nifr\u0259tin, q\u0259z\u0259bin n\u0259 oldu\u011funu bilm\u0259y\u0259n bir \u0130NSAN ya\u015fay\u0131r&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Bu k\u00f6kd\u0259 Onun qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131na nec\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xacaqd\u0131m?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br>H\u0259yat\u0131mda ilk d\u0259f\u0259 qaranl\u0131\u011fa sevindim&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br>H\u0259yat\u0131mda ilk d\u0259f\u0259 Onu s\u0259sind\u0259n tan\u0131d\u0131m. Bu s\u0259s min ill\u0259rin yol\u00e7usu kimi yor\u011fun idi, d\u00fcnyan\u0131n o biri ba\u015f\u0131ndan g\u0259lirdi: <strong>\u201c\u018fn m\u00fcq\u0259dd\u0259s t\u0259mizliyin \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 bel\u0259 onun qon\u015fulu\u011fundak\u0131 \u00e7irkab\u0131n ni\u015fan\u0259l\u0259ri qal\u0131r&#8230;\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong><br><\/strong>Q\u0259fild\u0259n aln\u0131ma \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131lan yumru\u011fu ba\u015f\u0131ma endiril\u0259n z\u0259rb\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 qar\u0131\u015f\u0131q salsayd\u0131m, b\u0259lk\u0259 bu s\u00f6zl\u0259ri d\u0259 t\u0259s\u0259lli kimi qar\u015f\u0131layard\u0131m. M\u0259n indi he\u00e7 vaxt \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 g\u00fcz\u0259\u015ft\u0259 getm\u0259y\u0259n, d\u00fcnyan\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 tapan v\u0259 g\u00f6z\u0259ll\u0259\u015fdirm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan t\u0259nha bir q\u0259rib\u0259 \u00e7evrilmi\u015fdim: f\u0131rt\u0131nal\u0131 d\u0259nizin ortas\u0131ndak\u0131 balaca adam\u0131 t\u0259kba\u015f\u0131na, h\u0259yat\u0131m bahas\u0131na qoruyurdum! Bu adan\u0131n anbaan ya\u011fmalanan s\u0259rh\u0259dl\u0259rin\u0259 baxmaq diri-diri torpa\u011fa k\u00f6m\u00fclm\u0259k q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259h\u015f\u0259tli idi! Qaranl\u0131q \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 p\u0259rd\u0259 kimi \u00e7\u0259kilirdi&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Azman dal\u011falar d\u0259mir\u00e7i k\u00f6r\u00fcy\u00fcnd\u0259n s\u0131\u00e7rayan alov diliml\u0259ri idi el\u0259 bil, asta-asta ayaqlar\u0131ma \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131landa var g\u00fcc\u00fcml\u0259 i\u00e7imd\u0259ki \u0130nsan\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 ba\u011f\u0131rd\u0131m! Dilimd\u0259n qopan k\u0259lm\u0259l\u0259rin son n\u0259f\u0259simd\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc m\u00fcdafi\u0259 etm\u0259k x\u0259trin\u0259 deyilm\u0259diyini indi ancaq O ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015f\u0259 bil\u0259rdi:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br>&#8212; M\u0259ni ba\u015fqalar\u0131 kimi olma\u011fa S\u0259n qoymad\u0131n! S\u0259n m\u0259ni ax\u0131na qar\u015f\u0131 \u00fczm\u0259y\u0259 vadar etdin, S\u0259n! S\u0259n m\u0259ni k\u00f6hn\u0259 d\u0259yirmana t\u0259z\u0259 n\u0131rx qoymaq ist\u0259y\u0259n a\u011f\u0131ldank\u0259m, \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n m\u00fc\u015ft\u0259beh bir gicb\u0259s\u0259r\u0259, t\u0259lx\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7evirdin!..<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br>Sonuncu d\u0259f\u0259 sinif ota\u011f\u0131na gir\u0259nd\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259llim olmaq ist\u0259y\u0259n \u015fagirdl\u0259rimi bir-bir yerimd\u0259 oturdan da, m\u0259ni parta arxas\u0131nda \u0259yl\u0259\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 vadar ed\u0259n d\u0259 S\u0259n idin, ba\u015fqalar\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 yerd\u0259n yer\u0259 vuran da, al\u00e7aldan da!..<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><br>Aman Allah! M\u0259nim \u015fagirdl\u0259rimin \u00e7iyni k\u0259p\u0259n\u0259k qanadlar\u0131 kimi idi! <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>M\u0259l\u0259k\u00fczl\u00fcl\u0259rim bu qanadlarla \u015fah\u0259 qalxm\u0131\u015f dal\u011falar\u0131n amans\u0131z t\u0259zyiqin\u0259 nec\u0259 tab g\u0259tir\u0259c\u0259kdi! Dayand\u0131\u011f\u0131m s\u0259hn\u0259d\u0259 b\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 d\u00fcnyan\u0131n \u0259n k\u0259d\u0259rli faci\u0259si ya\u015fan\u0131rd\u0131. Vicdan\u0131m qolu qandall\u0131 qul idi el\u0259 bil, sabah\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131lmayacaq bir g\u00fcn\u00fcn i\u00e7ind\u0259 \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131n\u0131r, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc oda-k\u00f6z\u0259 vururdu! Ancaq s\u0259n he\u00e7 n\u0259yi vecin\u0259 alm\u0131rd\u0131n! O u\u015faqlar\u0131n d\u00fcz g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn i\u00e7in\u0259 bax\u0131b yaban\u00e7\u0131 k\u0259lm\u0259l\u0259rinl\u0259 dayand\u0131\u011f\u0131n yerd\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 x\u0259yali s\u0259lt\u0259n\u0259t qururdun. M\u0259n onda bu k\u0259lm\u0259l\u0259ri k\u0259rpic kimi \u00fcst-\u00fcst\u0259 h\u00f6r\u0259n ita\u0259tkar b\u0259nnana \u00e7evrilmi\u015fdin: <strong>\u201c\u018fg\u0259r s\u0259n d\u0259 h\u0259r f\u00fcrs\u0259td\u0259 \u00f6z \u015fagirdl\u0259rind\u0259n r\u00fc\u015fv\u0259t alacaqsansa, sonra onu o\u011fru pi\u015fik kimi sevin\u0259-sevin\u0259 \u00f6z evin\u0259 da\u015f\u0131yacaqsansa, daha sonra bahal\u0131 restoranlarda, istirah\u0259t m\u0259rk\u0259zl\u0259rind\u0259 pozlar ver\u0259c\u0259ks\u0259ns\u0259, bir s\u00f6zl\u0259, \u0259vv\u0259lc\u0259 s\u00fcr\u00fcd\u0259n bir quzuya, sonra nax\u0131rdan bir in\u0259y\u0259, daha sonra x\u0131ldan bir k\u00f6p\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7evril\u0259c\u0259ks\u0259ns\u0259, b\u0259ri ba\u015fdan \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 ba\u015fqa s\u0259n\u0259t se\u00e7! Get pi\u015ftaxta arxas\u0131nda dayan! N\u0259yi ist\u0259yirs\u0259ns\u0259, al! N\u0259yi ist\u0259yirs\u0259ns\u0259, sat! Amma mill\u0259tin g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259yini satma!!!\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong><br><\/strong>S\u0259n bu s\u00f6zl\u0259ri kim\u0259 deyirdin?! Xalq\u0131n g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259k 50-100 ilini 5-10 adam\u0131n 5-10 illik k\u00fcrs\u00fc ehtiras\u0131na d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259nl\u0259rin \u00f6vladlar\u0131nam\u0131!? \u00d6z\u00fc d\u0259 harada! Bizim C\u0259bi\u015f m\u00fc\u0259llimi bizim \u00e7\u0259pi\u015f m\u00fc\u0259llim kimi \u00e7a\u011f\u0131ran b\u0259zirganlar\u0131n bazar\u0131nda! Sabahlar\u0131n g\u00fcnb\u0259g\u00fcn edam olundu\u011fu, qan\u0131na q\u0259ltan edildiyi yerd\u0259! Bu bazarda aya\u011f\u0131m\u0131 qoyma\u011fa bir ovuc m\u00fcq\u0259dd\u0259s yer tapa bilmir\u0259ms\u0259, dem\u0259li, qara quru\u015fa d\u0259ym\u0259y\u0259n varl\u0131\u011f\u0131mla daha he\u00e7 kim\u0259 laz\u0131m deyil\u0259m. M\u0259n burada Mirz\u0259 F\u0259t\u0259linin ortal\u0131qda qalm\u0131\u015f meyiti kimiy\u0259m, basd\u0131ran\u0131m yoxdur! Can\u0131mda H\u0259s\u0259n b\u0259yin \u00e7arpay\u0131 alt\u0131nda ill\u0259rl\u0259 g\u00f6y\u00fcmg\u00f6y\u00fcm g\u00f6yn\u0259y\u0259n s\u00fcm\u00fckl\u0259rinin s\u0131z\u0131lt\u0131s\u0131 var! M\u0259n indi Mirz\u0259 C\u0259lilin m\u0259zara qoyulan, amma torpaqlanmam\u0131\u015fdan \u00f6nc\u0259 ham\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 t\u00fcp\u00fcrdy\u00fc k\u0259f\u0259nl\u0259nmi\u015f n\u0259\u015fiy\u0259m!..<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Son n\u0259f\u0259simd\u0259 pay\u0131ma d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n g\u00fcnahlar\u0131m\u0131 da \u00f6z\u00fcml\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb gedir\u0259m. Ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr\u0259m, bu g\u00fcnahlar \u0130NSAN yeti\u015fdir\u0259 bilm\u0259m\u0259k q\u0259d\u0259r a\u011f\u0131r v\u0259 ba\u011f\u0131\u015flanmazd\u0131r! Ancaq he\u00e7 kimd\u0259n \u0259fv olunma\u011f\u0131m\u0131 ist\u0259mir\u0259m! Yegan\u0259 ist\u0259yim se\u00e7\u0259nl\u0259rin d\u0259, se\u00e7il\u0259nl\u0259rin d\u0259 ir\u0259li durub \u00f6z g\u00fcnahlar\u0131na sahib \u00e7\u0131xmas\u0131d\u0131r! Bundan \u00f6tr\u00fc yen\u0259 d\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 s\u00f6ym\u0259k, yen\u0259 d\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 t\u00fcp\u00fcrm\u0259k laz\u0131md\u0131rsa, buyurun, n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r ist\u0259yirsizs\u0259, s\u00f6y\u00fcn, n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r ist\u0259yirsizs\u0259, t\u00fcp\u00fcr\u00fcn! <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u018fg\u0259r orada bir \u00e7imdik saf yer qal\u0131bsa&#8230; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/fedai.az\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/2020-03-10-17-37-56WQymX5nGdIjQEeey1KZG_file.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-2384\" width=\"200\" height=\"125\"\/><figcaption> <strong>\u0130brahim R\u00dcST\u018fML\u0130,<br>M\u00fcharib\u0259 veteran\u0131, \u0259m\u0259kdar jurnalist<\/strong>  <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Bu m\u0259nim s\u0259h\u0259ri dirig\u00f6zl\u00fc a\u00e7d\u0131\u011f\u0131m adi g\u00fcnl\u0259rimd\u0259n deyildi: B\u00fct\u00fcn gec\u0259ni \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 t\u00fcp\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcl\u0259r&#8230;K\u00fcnc\u0259 s\u0131x\u0131\u015fd\u0131r\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259ki tavan g\u00f6y \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fcn Allah qat\u0131 il\u0259 birg\u0259 \u00fcst\u00fcm\u0259 u\u00e7urulmu\u015fdu.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2383","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-siyast"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2383","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2383"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2383\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2387,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2383\/revisions\/2387"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2383"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2383"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2383"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}