Art\u0131q bir \u0259srd\u0259n \u00e7oxdur ki, q\u00fcdr\u0259tli \u0259dib Lev Tolstoy d\u00fcnyadan k\u00f6\u00e7\u00fcb. Lakin onun \u015f\u0259xsi h\u0259yat\u0131 \u0259traf\u0131nda t\u00fc\u011fyan ed\u0259n \u015faiy\u0259l\u0259r h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 s\u0259ngim\u0259k bilmir. Kimisi Levi \u00f6z evind\u0259 dustaq say\u0131r, kimisi yarad\u0131c\u0131 ruhunu anlamayan h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131n\u0131n onu d\u00fcnyadan k\u00fcsd\u00fcrd\u00fcy\u00fcn\u00fc d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr. \u018fslind\u0259 is\u0259 h\u0259r \u015fey g\u00f6r\u00fcnd\u00fcy\u00fcnd\u0259n d\u0259 m\u00fcr\u0259kk\u0259bdir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Onun bu \u0259rk\u00f6y\u00fcnl\u00fcy\u00fcn\u0259 \u0259n \u00e7ox d\u00f6z\u0259n h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131 Sonya idi. Tolstoy hesab edirdi ki, ideal \u0259r-arvad \u00fcnsiyy\u0259tini m\u0259ktubla\u015fma yolu il\u0259 saxlamaq m\u00fcmk\u00fcnd\u00fcr. Sonya is\u0259 s\u00f6hb\u0259tl\u0259\u015fm\u0259d\u0259n, bir-birinin s\u0259sini, h\u0259rar\u0259tini duymadan, ya\u015fama\u011f\u0131n m\u0259nas\u0131z oldu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc. Lev xan\u0131m\u0131n\u0131 evin divarlar\u0131na da q\u0131sqand\u0131\u011f\u0131 halda, onun yan\u0131nda sad\u0259 k\u0259nd\u00e7i q\u0131zlarla sevi\u015fm\u0259yin daha z\u00f6vql\u00fc oldu\u011funu dil\u0259 g\u0259tirm\u0259kd\u0259n \u00e7\u0259kinmirdi. Ail\u0259 quranda g\u0259nc yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131n\u0131n 34, ziyal\u0131, zad\u0259gan xan\u0131m\u0131n\u0131nsa 18 ya\u015f\u0131 vard\u0131. Tolstoy Sonyan\u0131 t\u0259k q\u0259lbinin deyil, a\u011fl\u0131n\u0131n da dikt\u0259sil\u0259 se\u00e7mi\u015fdi. C\u00fctl\u00fck h\u0259l\u0259 ni\u015fanl\u0131 ik\u0259n Lev arada yalan olmas\u0131n dey\u0259, h\u0259yat\u0131ndak\u0131 b\u00fct\u00fcn qad\u0131nlar haqda dan\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. H\u0259tta zifaf gec\u0259si zad\u0259gan q\u0131z\u0131n yataqda onu yan\u0131ltd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 v\u0259 yet\u0259rinc\u0259 ehtirasl\u0131 olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bildirmi\u015fdi. Toy gec\u0259sinin s\u0259h\u0259ri g\u00fcnd\u0259liyin\u0259 bu s\u00f6zl\u0259ri yazm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 \u201cQane olmad\u0131m\u201d!
O, yarad\u0131c\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259l\u0259rin\u0259 tabe olacaq canl\u0131n\u0131 Sonyan\u0131n timsal\u0131nda tapm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. H\u0259m\u00e7inin k\u00fcbar xan\u0131m\u0131n q\u0259lbin\u0259 m\u0259lh\u0259m olan musiqil\u0259r\u0259 q\u0131c\u0131qlan\u0131rd\u0131. Sonyan\u0131n b\u00f6y\u00fcd\u00fcy\u00fc ev\u0259 daim y\u00fcks\u0259k v\u0259zif\u0259li \u015f\u0259xsl\u0259r qonaq g\u0259l\u0259r, royal s\u0259si, \u015fampan, \u015f\u0259rab q\u0259d\u0259hl\u0259rinin toxunu\u015fu \u0259r\u015f\u0259 ucalard\u0131. Evl\u0259n\u0259nd\u0259n sonra is\u0259 \u0259ri onu k\u0259ndd\u0259ki evind\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xma\u011fa da qoymurdu. Sonya is\u0259 dig\u0259r k\u0259nd qad\u0131nlar\u0131 kimi h\u0259r il bir u\u015faq do\u011furdu. Tostoy ail\u0259sind\u0259 do\u011fulan 13 u\u015faqdan 5-i h\u0259l\u0259 ki\u00e7ik ya\u015flar\u0131nda d\u00fcnyadan k\u00f6\u00e7m\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcl\u0259r. \u00c7ar\u0259siz qad\u0131nsa s\u00fcd v\u0259zl\u0259rind\u0259 ciddi x\u0259st\u0259lik a\u015fkarlansa da, \u0259rinin t\u0259kidi il\u0259 b\u00fct\u00fcn \u00f6vladlar\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fc \u0259mizdirirdi.
\u018fdib 60 ya\u015f\u0131ndan sonra h\u0259yat t\u0259rzini tamam d\u0259yi\u015fir. Ail\u0259sind\u0259n, do\u011fmalar\u0131ndan uzaqla\u015f\u0131b, balaca bir k\u0259nd evin\u0259 k\u00f6\u00e7\u00fcr. Varl\u0131 t\u0259b\u0259q\u0259nin yol verdiyi b\u0259dx\u0259rcliyi g\u00fcnah sayma\u011fa ba\u015flay\u0131r. Sad\u0259 k\u0259nd libas\u0131 geyinib, b\u00fct\u00fcn t\u0259s\u0259rr\u00fcfat i\u015fl\u0259rini, ehtiyaclar\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fc qar\u015f\u0131lay\u0131r. N\u0259 Sonya, n\u0259 d\u0259 \u00f6vladlar\u0131 bu a\u011f\u0131ls\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131 q\u0259bul ed\u0259 bilmirdil\u0259r. M\u0259hz buna g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 Tolstoy \u00f6vladlar\u0131n\u0131n he\u00e7 biri il\u0259 dil tapa bilmirdi. Buna baxmayaraq dahi Tolstoy d\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 Sonyaya olan sonsuz e\u015fqini v\u0259 \u00f6mr\u00fc boyunca yaln\u0131z onu sevdiyini etiraf edib.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ail\u0259nin b\u00f6y\u00fck q\u0131z\u0131 Tatyana g\u00f6z\u0259l r\u0259ssam idi, tez-tez ev\u0259 yarad\u0131c\u0131 elitan\u0131 d\u0259v\u0259t edir, d\u00fcnya s\u0259yah\u0259tin\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xma\u011f\u0131 arzulay\u0131rd\u0131. Dig\u0259r bac\u0131s\u0131 Marina is\u0259 atas\u0131n\u0131n m\u0259sl\u0259kda\u015f\u0131 idi. O da \u00e7\u0131l\u011f\u0131n yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 kimi taxtan\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 yat\u0131r, \u0259t yem\u0259kd\u0259n imtina edirdi. \u00c7ox ke\u00e7mir ki, Marina g\u00fccl\u00fc soyuqd\u0259ym\u0259d\u0259n d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259yi\u015fir. Bu ah\u0131l atan\u0131n h\u0259yatdan ald\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u0259n a\u011f\u0131r z\u0259rb\u0259 idi. O, yaln\u0131z \u00f6vlad\u0131n\u0131 deyil, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259l\u0259rin\u0259 \u015f\u0259rik \u00e7\u0131xan dostunu itirmi\u015fdi. M\u0259rhum q\u0131z\u0131ndan ba\u015fqa he\u00e7 kim onun \u201cMusiqi, imtahanlar, rahat h\u0259yat \u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fck c\u0259zam\u0131zd\u0131r\u201d kimi fikirl\u0259rini anlam\u0131rd\u0131. \u00d6vladlar\u0131n\u0131 bu y\u00f6nd\u0259 b\u00f6y\u00fcd\u0259n Sonyan\u0131 is\u0259 \u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fck g\u00fcnahkar say\u0131rd\u0131. \u00c7\u00fcnki o evd\u0259 s\u0259liq\u0259-s\u0259hman yarad\u0131r, u\u015faqlar\u0131n\u0131 t\u0259hsil\u0259 c\u0259lb edir v\u0259 xidm\u0259t\u00e7il\u0259rin k\u00f6m\u0259yind\u0259n istifad\u0259 edirdi.
\u00dcmumiyy\u0259tl\u0259 is\u0259, Tolstoy ail\u0259sinin \u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fck c\u0259zas\u0131 8 ya\u015fl\u0131 Vanyan\u0131n \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fc olur. Ail\u0259 Vani\u00e7kan\u0131 Allah\u0131n m\u00fckafat\u0131 adland\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131. O, qeyri-ad\u0131 g\u00f6zl\u0259ri, su kimi saf q\u0259lbi il\u0259 b\u00fct\u00fcn evi i\u015f\u0131qland\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131. Vanya k\u00fcs\u00fcl\u00fcl\u0259ri bar\u0131\u015fd\u0131r\u0131r, evd\u0259 s\u00fclh yarad\u0131rd\u0131. O\u011flu d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259nd\u0259, Sonya a\u011fl\u0131n\u0131 itirm\u0259k h\u0259ddin\u0259 bel\u0259 \u00e7at\u0131r. Lev is\u0259 o\u011flunun \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn\u0259 g\u00fcnd\u0259liyind\u0259 bel\u0259 izah verirdi: \u201cT\u0259bi\u0259t biz\u0259 \u0259n ya\u015f\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 b\u0259x\u015f edir. Bizim bu b\u0259x\u015fi\u015fi q\u0259bul etm\u0259y\u0259 haz\u0131r olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 is\u0259 geri al\u0131r\u201d.
Ail\u0259sind\u0259n, Moskvadak\u0131 evind\u0259n uzaqla\u015f\u0131b, k\u0259ndd\u0259 yaln\u0131z ya\u015fayan yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131, provoslav kils\u0259sini t\u0259bli\u011f etm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flay\u0131r. Sonya il\u0259 m\u00fcnasib\u0259ti is\u0259 getdikc\u0259 daha da s\u0259rtl\u0259\u015firdi. Onlar bir-birin\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259k s\u00f6zl\u0259rini yaln\u0131z \u00f6z g\u00fcnd\u0259likl\u0259rin\u0259 qeyd edirdil\u0259r.
Sonradan Sonya Tolstaya memuarlar\u0131nda yazacaqd\u0131:
\u201cM\u0259nim \u0259ziz, mehriban \u0259rim. S\u0259ninl\u0259 b\u00fct\u00f6vl\u0259\u015f\u0259 bilm\u0259dik. M\u0259nd\u0259n g\u00f6zl\u0259dikl\u0259rini s\u0259n\u0259 verm\u0259k iqtidar\u0131nda olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131m \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ba\u011f\u0131\u015fla! \u00c7\u00fcnki s\u0259nin ard\u0131nda azad yarad\u0131c\u0131l\u0131q e\u015fqi, m\u0259nims\u0259 arxamda b\u00f6y\u00fck bir ail\u0259nin m\u0259suliyy\u0259ti dayan\u0131rd\u0131\u201d.
B\u00fct\u00fcn qar\u015f\u0131durmalara r\u0259\u011fm\u0259n bu g\u00fccl\u00fc xan\u0131m \u0259rinin \u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fck d\u0259st\u0259k\u00e7isi idi. Sonya b\u00fct\u00fcn bu qa\u00e7haqa\u00e7dan imkan tap\u0131b, Levin \u0259s\u0259rl\u0259rini qaralamadan t\u0259miz v\u0259r\u0259ql\u0259r\u0259 k\u00f6\u00e7\u00fcr\u00fcrd\u00fc. B\u0259z\u0259n h\u0259tta 1000 s\u0259hif\u0259lik yaz\u0131n\u0131 bir ne\u00e7\u0259 g\u00fcn\u0259 bitirir, n\u0259\u015friyyat evl\u0259ril\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131qlar apar\u0131rd\u0131. Bu g\u00fcn Tolstoy x\u0259zin\u0259sinin \u0259limiz\u0259 \u00e7atan bir \u00e7ox incisin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 Sonya xan\u0131ma borcluyuq.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
1910-cu ild\u0259 \u0259d\u0259biyyat\u0131n s\u00f6nm\u0259z g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fi g\u00f6zl\u0259rini \u0259b\u0259di yumur. Onun \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcnd\u0259n 9 il sonra is\u0259 Sonya \u0259rinin yan\u0131na, onunla ruh\u0259n, q\u0259lb\u0259n bir olma\u011fa gedir.
Yax\u0131n g\u00fcnl\u0259rd\u0259 tarix\u00e7il\u0259r \u0259dibin v\u0259 Sonya Tolstayan\u0131n g\u00fcnd\u0259likl\u0259rind\u0259 bir-birin\u0259 \u00fcnvanlad\u0131qlar\u0131 \u0259n z\u0259rif misralar\u0131 a\u015fkarlay\u0131blar.
Tolstoy b\u00fct\u00fcn m\u0259ktublar\u0131nda h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131na \u201c\u0259ziz dost\u201d dey\u0259 m\u00fcraci\u0259t ed\u0259rdi.
\u201c\u018fziz dost, s\u0259nd\u0259n n\u00f6vb\u0259ti k\u0259d\u0259rli m\u0259ktub ald\u0131m. Bel\u0259 anlay\u0131ram ki, h\u0259m fiziki, h\u0259m d\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259vi \u0259zab \u00e7\u0259kirs\u0259n. Bihal oldu\u011funu bilib, vaxt\u0131m\u0131 \u015f\u0259n v\u0259 sakit ke\u00e7ird\u0259 bilm\u0259r\u0259m. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259l\u0259rim s\u0259ninl\u0259dir. O q\u00fcss\u0259li m\u0259kubdan sonra ist\u0259s\u0259m d\u0259, aya\u011fa qalxa bilmir\u0259m. M\u0259ni k\u0259d\u0259rl\u0259ndir\u0259n n\u0259 varsa, ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 sadalam\u0131san. Rica edir\u0259m, bir \u015feyi unutma. \u00d6mr\u00fcm\u00fcn \u0259sas qay\u0259si s\u0259nin h\u0259yat\u0131nd\u0131r. S\u0259nin \u0259hval\u0131n y\u00fcks\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 sevinir, \u00fcr\u0259yin q\u0259ml\u0259n\u0259nd\u0259 is\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fcl\u00fcr\u0259m. Lakin m\u0259n \u0259min\u0259m ki, g\u00fccl\u00fc ruhun s\u0259ni q\u0259md\u0259n azad ed\u0259c\u0259k v\u0259 xo\u015fb\u0259xtlik g\u0259tir\u0259c\u0259k. M\u0259n fiziki q\u00fcrubun g\u00fcnb\u0259g\u00fcn daha da yeyin add\u0131mlarla yax\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 e\u015fidir\u0259m. S\u0259nin k\u0259d\u0259rli g\u00f6zl\u0259rins\u0259 onun g\u0259li\u015fini daha da s\u00fcr\u0259tl\u0259ndirir.
Lev Tolstoyun g\u00fcnd\u0259liyind\u0259n\u2026
\u201cM\u0259nim Taneyev\u0259 olan m\u00fcnasib\u0259tim\u0259 qar\u015f\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131\u011f\u0131 kimi, m\u0259n d\u0259 onun Qurevi\u00e7l\u0259 \u00fcnsiyy\u0259tini b\u0259y\u0259nm\u0259diyimi bir az ehtiyats\u0131z bildirdim. \u00dcz\u00fcn\u0259 baxanda, v\u00fccudumu qorxu b\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fc. Son g\u00fcnl\u0259r bir az da qal\u0131nla\u015fan qa\u015flar\u0131 hidd\u0259tli g\u00f6zl\u0259rinin \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 ox kimi \u00e7\u00f6kd\u00fc. \u018fzabke\u015f \u00fcz ifad\u0259si q\u0259lbimi par\u00e7alad\u0131. Ax\u0131 bu sima mehriban, ehtiras v\u0259 sevgi il\u0259 baxanda daha g\u00f6z\u0259ldir. Tez-tez bir fikir m\u0259ni yamanca d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcr\u00fcr. H\u0259qiq\u0259t\u0259n, onun qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda g\u00fcnah\u0131m olsayd\u0131, m\u0259n\u0259 hans\u0131 x\u0259t\u0259ri yetir\u0259rdi?!
M\u0259ni g\u00fcnah v\u0259 x\u0259yan\u0259tin d\u0259h\u015f\u0259tind\u0259n azad etdiyi \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn Allaha minn\u0259tdaram. O, m\u0259ni yad ehtirasdan h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 zaman\u0131nda xilas edib\u201d.
Sonya Tolstayan\u0131n g\u00fcnd\u0259liyind\u0259n\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201c\u018fziz dost, Sonya,
\u018fn b\u00f6y\u00fck faci\u0259 v\u0259 ay\u0131b odur ki, s\u00f6z\u00fcn h\u0259r m\u0259nas\u0131nda yaramaz v\u0259 maraqs\u0131z insanlar h\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 idar\u0259 etsin. \u00d6mr\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn son ilini pu\u00e7a \u00e7evirsin. H\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131z boyu bizi ay\u0131racaq hadis\u0259l\u0259r\u0259 r\u0259\u011fm\u0259n, daha da yax\u0131nla\u015f\u0131b, bir-birimiz\u0259 \u0259vv\u0259lkind\u0259n qat-qat do\u011fmala\u015fm\u0131\u015fk\u0259n bunun ba\u015f verm\u0259si \u0259dal\u0259tsizlikdir. Bizim b\u00fct\u00f6vl\u0259\u015fm\u0259yimiz h\u0259l\u0259 Vani\u00e7kan\u0131n \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcnd\u0259n \u00f6nc\u0259 c\u00fcc\u0259rm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Getdikc\u0259 daha da d\u0259rin\u0259 k\u00f6k atan sevgi a\u011fac\u0131n\u0131n k\u00f6lg\u0259sind\u0259 s\u0259rinl\u0259diyimiz vaxtda, 35 illiyimizin son g\u00fcnl\u0259rind\u0259 bu iyr\u0259nc v\u0259rdi\u015fin yen\u0259 h\u0259r \u015fey\u0259 m\u00f6h\u00fcr qoydu. Bilir\u0259m ki, s\u0259n\u0259 \u00e7ox a\u011f\u0131rd\u0131r, m\u0259ni \u00e7ox sevdiyin\u0259 d\u0259 \u015f\u00fcbh\u0259m yoxdur. Bil ki, m\u0259ni \u00e7ox m\u0259yus etdin. S\u0259nin yerin\u0259 utan\u0131ram. S\u0259ni \u0259n d\u0259rin, \u0259n \u00e7\u0131l\u011f\u0131n hissl\u0259riml\u0259 sevir\u0259m.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Art\u0131q bir \u0259srd\u0259n \u00e7oxdur ki, q\u00fcdr\u0259tli \u0259dib Lev Tolstoy d\u00fcnyadan k\u00f6\u00e7\u00fcb. Lakin onun \u015f\u0259xsi h\u0259yat\u0131 \u0259traf\u0131nda t\u00fc\u011fyan ed\u0259n \u015faiy\u0259l\u0259r h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 s\u0259ngim\u0259k bilmir. Kimisi<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":99878,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[18,3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-99877","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dbi-dusunclr","category-gundm"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99877","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=99877"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99877\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":99879,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99877\/revisions\/99879"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/99878"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=99877"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=99877"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fedai.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=99877"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}